Chance Encounter

“Late one afternoon

On my way home from work

I stopped by the dry cleaners

To pick up a jacket and shirt

And on my way out I remembered
I needed some eggs and milk

So I walked over to the mart

And saw the one who made my heart wilt

She caught my eyes in a glimmer

And looked away unnoticing

Then memory crept in

And her eyes started refocusing

For a moment time slowed

As fluid in her eyes began showing

Memories of a past life

And love long lost were emoting

I managed a “Hello love”

Through an unsteady, cracking voice

And despite my hesitance

A “Hi there” was her response of choice

“I couldn’t believe

After all these years
Of all the places

That I’d run into you here.”
She responded politely

That she was visiting family

Happy to see me

And wondered if Life had been good to me?

“Well, I graduated school
And ran straight for NYC
Without any money saved
I missed out on celebrity
But I returned to Jersey
Settled in on education

Teaching while still writing

Awaiting my motivation

To pen the perfect masterpiece
A pinnacle to all of my creations

Unfortunately I’d ran ashore

And was in need of inspiration”

I asked how she had been

She replied she was doing fine
Asked about her love life
Her response was merely a sigh

She uttered not a syllable

Yet, her face remained endearing
She offered a similar inquisition
A silent replica of my query

“There have been a few
Casual acquaintances

Nothing very special

Usually high-maintenance”
I didn’t say I stopped looking
Just that I didn’t have the time

Or that no one could compare
I’m sure that she knew why

We started down an old path
And began revisiting the past
How strong we thought our love was
And swore it would always last

Then she began to weep
As she reached inside her purse
I thought perhaps for a tissue
What she revealed made it worse

In the palm of her hand
A symbol of every empty promise
A tiny silver ring
A reminder of all that was dishonest

I told her that I was sorry
That with time I had changed

A sardonic smile response,
“Good, but you’re a little too late”

And that reminded me of a lyric

Of a musician we both revered

And in daydream I began humming

A song of ours that moved her to tears

“Cause all I wanna be

Is the minute that you hold me in
When you pretend that
I’m all that you waited for
Then time slips to nothing
And I’m better than I’ve ever been
I’m suspended…”
She begged me please to stop
And I awoke to find her wincing

Caressing her chin upward
Her brown eyes seemed fairly convincing

That what was once something special
A love so pure and unique
Was nothing more than a memory
A falling star now obsolete

And as I was going to ask her
A curious man began to approach
And before he muttered a word
I knew who he was before he spoke
“There you are honey
I must have lost you in aisle eight
We really must be going
Dinner’s soon and we’re running late”
Fighting tears she gave a look
And tried desperately to introduce

My hope now fully faded,
“Thanks a lot for the tip…I’ll try to put it to use”
I turned and walked away
As if nothing more than a stranger
Thought of all those broken promises
And how much that must have changed her

After dinner that night
I received a call
I repeatedly said “Hello?”
But there was no response at all
Somehow amidst the silence
I suddenly heard her speak
There wasn’t an audible word
I simply sensed that it was she
So I remained on the line
And waited ever so patiently
Reliving every moment
Held between her and me
I could feel her touching my face
Caressing my shoulders like she used to
I could sense the warmth of her breath
Wishing I could hold her the way I used to
Then right as I was about to confess
That I loved her and I’d never move on
I heard a sigh and then a click
And once again she was gone.” -E.Ricci, January 12, 2008 …back when it all mattered.

Don’t Get Up, I can find my way to the door…

“…You’ve shown me how now
To walk away
But even if I left
The feeling stays

It’s clear now that your found
Something I can’t be
And you can’t risk losing that comfort
By putting your faith in me

Now we’re reduced to remembering

Just know

This has nothing to do with me
And everything with you
I thought that we were
Worth saving

But you’ve drifted away from this
And there’s no pulling you back in
I can’t be the only one here
Believing…” -Everything, Averi

It’s Over.

Posting,

E.Ricci

I still miss you…

She told me what you said while I’ve been away

Praying for something better, perhaps another day
She said, I think you should know what she wrote
And overwhelmed me with words from a note
“I still miss you, I’ve done everything to move on like i’m supposed to…I still miss you”

At first glance I figured it was for someone else
By now you’d probably made out of that old spell
That love was lost and what you had once felt
By now you’d given away to somebody else

Fingertips & Innocence…

“I fell to pieces
‘Cause you never came back
I tore it all apart
Till there was nothing left
Yes I fell to pieces
You never came back
I’m still waiting here…

You filled me
And left me
With absolutely nothing.”

Posting,

E.Ricci

I’m Out

And I’m Out.

I’m out of laughs
I’m out of cries
I’m out of pleas
I’m out of tries

I’m out of apologies
And tears
Full of excuses
For the last two years

Of that I want out

Now I just want out

And I’m out.

I’m out of chances
And still I deny
That you’d demand
We’d say goodbye

I’m out of my mind
Unwilling to accept
That you’d fail to find
Regret for having left

And so I’m out

I want out

I said I want out.

And I’m out

I’m out of reasoning
I’m out of line
Full of self-hatred
And so many why’s

I’m out of touch
Being out of your life
But it isn’t enough
So I want out of mine

I want out

I’m out
I’m out
I’m out
I’m out
I’m out…” -E.Ricci

Trying to Pretend…

“I’ve been seeing someone new
She’s nothing like you
But I’m not comparing

They tell me that it takes time
To be patient and I’ll find
Everything has it’s reason

But I don’t buy in
So I guess that I’ll keep fighting it

I’m waiting to forget
I’m trying to pretend
That I’m not missing you again

When you gracefully creep in
You bring back these feelings
But I’m not missing you

I’m not missing you…” -Averi

Messages Erased…Next Memory…

“Hi!!! I love you!
Who goes to class anymore?
Oh Goodness.
Okay. I’ll talk to you later.
I just wanted to tell you I love you.
Bye!!!”

End of message. To erase this message press seven. To save it…

Message Erased. Next Message…

Beachhouse

I’m laying on my back on a foldout couch
I hear footsteps pressing down the stairs
A shadow peers overhead I open my eyes
An angel reaches and caresses my jawline
Lowers down to me as I close my eyes
Her pursing lips connect with mine
Wishes me good night and I love you
Without ever uttering or mumbling a word
Then quietly floats back upwards
To the Heaven from which she descended
I lay there thinking nothing of it at the time
For this moment meant the world to her
That I am sure of
Where as for me
It should have meant more
Now I reflect upon moments like these
Reliving them in my head
And I realize how many times I took for granted
All that I had and could have ever wanted
The whole time I spent wanting more
Fiending for more carnal desires
While so many special moments passed by
I should have paid more attention
I should have been more patient
I should have been more understanding
And I should have loved her more
I should have been grateful
These are the lessons I have learned
I will not make the same mistakes twice.

Quote it

“I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken — and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.” -Margaret Mitchell

The Dream…Domestic Delusions of a Broken Man

It’s nearly one in the morning. I’m wide awake now. I was sleeping. But I was awoken by a recurring dream I’ve been having.

And now I can’t resume sleeping because this dream has my stomach in knots.

It’s the same dream I’ve been having for three months.